YOU MAKE ME SICK!

YOU MAKE ME SICK?!

What do you do when you love your significant other and they just make you sick? Meaning, for some reason everything they do, which used to be considered “cute” now annoys the shit out of you? Many of you will think the solution is to break-up however, you’ve realized breaking up or divorce isn’t want YOU want because you’re still in love with your partner. Therefore, the question again is why are they just so damn irritating lately?! Let’s explore...

Haven been in this situation as many have, I’ve realized that your mate’s ability to make you want to pummel them to the ground goes deeper then them leaving the toilet seat up. If you notice that your mate is complaining of the fact that EVERYTHING they do, lately seems to bother you, chances are what’s bothering you has little to do with the issue you ripped them a new a-hole for. I know you’ve heard this before, but it’s true, and that is “communication is the key!” Many times verbally and emotionally we hold on to what’s really troubling us in our relationships. We band-aid the issue, and let out our feelings during minute issues such as...

• I’M THE MAID/YOU’RE A SLOB

This scenario is the case of the couple who are opposites when it’s comes to cleanliness. In the beginning of the relationship when Ms. Clean-freak found out her man was a slob, she dealt with it. She had no problems catering to her honey, and cleaning up after him here and there...however, now she’s screaming at the top of her lungs Saturday morning while wiping off the sticky juice he let sit on the kitchen counter, and cursing to high hell while picking up his underwear. So to accommodate his screaming girlfriend he’s started to clean up around the house quite a bit, but to his surprise, Ms. Clean-freak STILL finds issues with Mr. Slob about HOW he cleans?! What’s that about?

• I’M A CHEF/YOU CAN’T COOK

In this case you knew when you met him he couldn’t do anything short of boil water, but you love to cook and had no problems catering to your man. You would whip up those 5 star dishes and just relish in the fact that your baby loved every morsel of your food...um well things have changed! The fact that he is SO useless in a kitchen irritates your soul. You start to complain that it would be nice to have a change for once, and have you be treated to a home cooked meal. The sound of him saying “did you cook?” makes you want to tell him “NO, did you cook m@!*?!.” Again I ask you, what’s that about? Why the sudden change?

• BOYS /GIRLS NIGHT OUT

Remember when you met, and you had zero issues about the fact that your honey had his night with his friends, as well as you with yours? Well, now when he says “I’m going out” your attitude scale weighs in at about TEN! He comes home after a night with the guys, and you damn near give him silent treatment, but why? You NEVER had this problem before?

• The Truth

The truth of the matter is that every aspect about the person you love and accepted about them from the beginning now irritates you to your core, but I’ve learned there are usually underlying larger issues to the minute ones we complain of. For instance, in the first scenario the girlfriend was picking up after her sloppy boyfriend and was really mad about it, which is natural overtime in a long-term relationship. However, even after the boyfriend started to help with the cleaning to alleviate the problem, she STILL found issues about his tidying method. The fact that there was still a problem after he tried, let’s you know that there’s really a larger issues going on. Those issues with us can range from being exhausted of playing the “mother role” or always having to be the grown up in the relationship, such as in always being the one to cook. The issues could range to feeling stagnate in a relationship, such as wanting to move, or get married and he’s not moving fast enough for you. If you have issues with the fact that he went out with the guys even after he spent the rest of the weekend dedicating his time to you, there are larger issues. Once again, it could range from the fact that 90% of the physical household responsibilities (kids, cleaning, cooking etc) fall on you, so him getting any free time irritates you. My point is, you should figure out the “REAL” reason behind your resentment and communicate them to your partner in a respectable way (leave all curse words out lol). If you choose not to express yourself, resentment builds and arguments become more frequent, which threatens the health of your relationship.